Women are deeply unhappy but too independent to admit it usually display these 7 habits, says psychology

I’ve always admired the strength of women. The way they assert their independence and resilience in the face of adversity. It’s truly awe-inspiring. But, have you ever stopped to consider that beneath this tough exterior, some women might be deeply unhappy?

It’s an unsettling thought.

Psychologists suggest that there are certain habits that these women often exhibit. Habits that conceal their unhappiness behind a facade of fierce independence.

The tricky part is, these habits are seldom recognized because they’re usually too proud or independent to admit their feelings.

So, if you’re intrigued and asking yourself, “What are these habits?” – stay with me. We’ll uncover the seven habits that psychology points to in women who are deeply unhappy but too independent to admit it.

Let’s delve deeper, shall we?

1) They put others first

We all know that one person who always seems to put everyone else’s needs before their own. The one who’s perpetually there for others, but rarely asks for help when they’re the ones in need.

This selfless trait is honorable, no doubt. But psychology suggests it can also be a sign of deep-seated unhappiness.

Women, especially those who value their independence highly, often fall into this pattern. They might feel like admitting their need for help or support is a sign of weakness.

This can lead to a cycle of neglecting their own needs and feelings, which only exacerbates their unhappiness.

It’s a tricky balancing act. Being there for others is important, but not at the expense of neglecting your own well-being. Recognizing this habit is the first step towards breaking the cycle and fostering authentic self-care.

2) They’re perfectionists

In my own life, I’ve seen this habit rear its head more times than I’d like to admit.

I remember working on a project that was close to my heart. I wanted it to be perfect, so much so that I lost countless hours of sleep and passed up on social events just to add those “finishing touches”.

Sounds familiar?

Women who are deeply unhappy but too independent to admit it often exhibit perfectionist tendencies. They set incredibly high standards for themselves and feel deeply disappointed when they don’t meet them.

Perfectionism isn’t necessarily bad. Striving for excellence can lead to great achievements. But when it turns into an obsession, it can significantly contribute to feelings of unhappiness.

It took me a while, but I finally realized the importance of balance. Of setting high standards, but also acknowledging that perfection is a myth. It’s okay to fall short sometimes. It’s okay to be human.

3) They rarely express their true feelings

Have you ever found yourself smiling through discomfort or biting back tears? Maybe you’ve brushed off a hurtful comment with a laugh, pretending it didn’t sting.

Strong, independent women often find it hard to express their true feelings. They bottle up their emotions, fearing that showing vulnerability will be seen as a sign of weakness.

But here’s the truth.

Ignoring or hiding your emotions doesn’t make them disappear. Instead, it just buries them deep within you, where they fester and grow, feeding into unhappiness.

Expressing your feelings isn’t a sign of weakness. It’s a sign of strength. It takes courage to be honest about your emotions, to let others see you as you are.

So next time you’re feeling down, allow yourself to feel. Let it out. It’s okay not to be okay all the time.

4) They struggle with self-care

“Who has time for self-care?” I used to ask myself this question regularly. Between work, family commitments, and maintaining a social life, it seemed like there just weren’t enough hours in the day for me.

Sound familiar?

This is a common mindset among independent women who are juggling multiple roles and responsibilities. They are so focused on taking care of everything and everyone around them that they often neglect their own needs.

Neglecting self-care can lead to burnout, stress, and—you guessed it—deep unhappiness.

Self-care isn’t a luxury; it’s a necessity. Whether it’s taking a few minutes each day to meditate, going for a walk, or even just making time for a hobby you love, taking care of yourself is crucial to maintaining your mental and emotional health.

Take that bubble bath. Read that book. Do whatever it is that makes you feel good about yourself. Because you deserve it.

5) They’re often overworked

Would it surprise you to learn that women are more likely than men to report feeling overworked? According to a study by the Families and Work Institute, nearly 40% of women reported feeling overworked compared to 31% of men.

That’s a significant difference.

Independent women, especially those who are unhappy, often find themselves taking on more than they can handle. They’re the first ones to arrive at work and the last ones to leave. They take on extra projects, even when their plate is already overflowing.

They do this because they believe they have to. Because they fear that saying “no” will make them seem weak or incapable.

But the truth is, overworking doesn’t lead to success—it leads to burnout and unhappiness.

Learning to say “no” and setting boundaries is not a sign of weakness; it’s a sign of strength. It shows that you value your time and your well-being. And trust me, that’s something worth standing up for.

6) They rarely ask for help

I remember a time when I was so overwhelmed with work and personal responsibilities that I felt like I was drowning. But instead of reaching out for help, I kept pushing myself harder and harder, convinced that I could handle it all on my own.

Does this resonate with you?

Many independent women find it difficult to ask for help. They carry their burdens alone, believing that they should be able to manage on their own.

But here’s a gentle reminder.

You don’t have to do it all alone. It’s okay to ask for help. In fact, asking for help is not a sign of weakness—it’s a sign of strength. It shows that you understand your limits and are wise enough to seek support when you need it.

So next time you’re feeling overwhelmed, remember that it’s okay to reach out to others. You’re not alone, and there are people who care about you and want to help.

7) They often feel undeserving of happiness

At the heart of it all, many independent women who are deeply unhappy often feel like they don’t deserve to be happy.

This is a painful realization, but it’s crucial to understand. They may downplay their accomplishments, reject compliments, and even sabotage their own success due to feelings of inadequacy.

But here’s the most important thing you should know.

Everyone is deserving of happiness – including you. Happiness is not a reward that you have to earn. It’s not a luxury reserved for a select few. It’s a basic human right.

If you find yourself feeling undeserving of joy, remember this: You are worthy. You are enough. And you deserve all the happiness in the world.

Embracing the journey

With awareness and effort, these habits can be reshaped. The key lies in self-compassion and setting boundaries. Independence is commendable, but not at the cost of your happiness.

Begin by recognizing these habits in your daily life. Be mindful of moments when you neglect your needs or suppress your emotions. Keep an eye out for instances when you take on more than you can handle.

Each time you catch yourself, pause.

Ask yourself – is this serving my happiness? Does this align with my values? Will saying “no” or expressing my feelings serve my well-being?

Change won’t happen instantly, and that’s okay.

Be patient with yourself. Each small step towards prioritizing your happiness is progress. Each moment of self-care, of expressing your truth, contributes to your growth.

Remember, you are deserving of happiness. You are enough, just as you are.

In time, these habits will transform. And as they do, you’ll uncover the most authentic version of yourself – one that’s independent, strong, and most importantly, happy.